Thursday, March 9, 2006
on gay adoption
By golly, after these many months I finally figured out how to post a comment! Thus emboldened, I add the following thought to Rick's recent note re adoption by gay couples in Mass.:
I don’t understand why I never hear or read of the simple non-moralistic argument that even if homosexual parents would be the best role models for genetically-predestined homosexual kids (assuming, as today's conventional wisdom claims, that there are such children) gay adoptive parents still would not be the best role models for the heterosexual kids whom EVERYONE concedes to be the vast majority of kids. Since we cannot at this time test orphans for that incredibly powerful gay gene, we should do what will work out best in that vast majority of cases, i.e. seek first of all to place them with straight parents.
In other words, if we place an infant (of necessarily unknown tendencies) with homosexual parents, even the most radical gay activist must concede that there is at least a 90% chance that the child’s parental sex-role models will not match his or her inner sexual tendency.
All by itself, the rather obvious argument above seems to me to provide sufficient reason for people of every ideological persuasion to reject putting adoption of children by homosexuals on a par with adoption by heterosexuals. Why is the argument not being made--or is it?
To say that they should NEVER be so placed would, however, be to claim that having mixed up sexual role models is the worst fate that could befall a child, which is doubtful. (This does not mean that Church agencies should not have a clear policy against such adoptions, e.g. in order to avoid scandal. It only means that an unintended lesser evil, bad role modeling, may be permitted if necessary in order to provide more immediately needed goods, e.g. food and shelter, I would think, now speaking from a Catholic perspective. I better stop here and see if others have any thoughts.)
BTW, I've been clicking on "SAVE" in order to post my comments, after composing them. Is this correct? It seems odd, but I don't see anything else to click on.
https://mirrorofjustice.blogs.com/mirrorofjustice/2006/03/on_gay_adoption.html
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Not to put to fine a point on it, but you've probably not heard this argument because there is nothing that backs it up. You are making a huge leap, (I understand that it is one that falls within your personal belief system), when you assume that "gay adoptive parents still would not be the best role models for the heterosexual kids."
Just to be clear, unless you can point to some sort of data that backs up your claim of inferior parent role-models, you are making a moralistic argument in that you believe something to be so because of your personal beliefs.
I do understand that your assumtion matches up with the position of the church, but what empirical evidence do you have? I've never heard of any study anywhere that claims that gay parents make bad role models for non-gay children. (Although I've seen plenty of evidence that parents that don't love one another are bad role models, but this of course has no relation to sexual orientation.)
The other glaring flaw in your argument is the fact that if it is true that gay parents make lousy role models for straight children, then straight parents make lousy role models for gay children. The logical conclusion of your argument would have straight children adopted by straight parents and gay children adopted by gay parents.
Maybe as a political answer this would be alright, but it explicitly goes against the teachings of he church and would make it impossible, (under the belief system that holds it is possible), for gay children to be redeemed back into "straightness."
Also, as a sidenote, I think you make the argument way to simplistic. What about two gay women raising a straight boy? Could they be good role models as opposed to two gay men raising a straight boy? And vice versa.
I personally believe that the best sex role models are those parents that love each-other and aren't afraid to let that be known. One of the best role models I had growing up was a gay "uncle", (he wasn't really related, but I didn't know that for years), that was very much in love with his partner. He taught me much about the meaning of kindness and respect for your partner in life. I didn't turn gay, and I like to think that I have a good relationship with my wife.
Explain to me how, if he had been my adoptive father, his example of love would have been a bad model for me to follow?